Month: February 2019

Midwest Matchmaking is in the business of relationships. Our Kansas City Matchmakers see which ones come and go, which ones have staying power, and which ones are doomed from the start.

We see oftentimes that many Midwest singles are attracted to the wrong people. Some women are attracted to “bad boys,” and at times men are attracted to the women who can be bad for them, as well. As serious a commitment as marriage is, some people choose to ignore the red flags and stay blinded by lust or convenience.

Men, if you’re looking to settle down with an emotionally healthy and mature woman who is secure in herself and will make a great partner, read below for the red flags our Kansas City matchmakers have made note of. And, if you’re already dating her, then run!

With that in mind, the following are Midwest Matchmaking’s 5 women that you should definitely not marry…or date, for that matter: 

Dating The Damsel in Distress

A lot of men love feeling like a superhero and rescuing someone who needs it, but you must ask yourself, “Why is she always attracting drama in her life?” You feel pity for her, and this tugs at your heartstrings. She is incapable of pulling herself up by her bootstraps. Just remember, if you rescue a damsel in distress, you end up with nothing more than a distressed damsel. Have you considered what will happen if you need someone to rely on? Chances are very high that she only knows how to be taken care of, not the other way around. The only thing that should need rescuing are children or furry creatures from the Humane Society. 

The Psycho Girlfriend

The psycho: These women are often beautiful. Sometimes supermodel gorgeous, and you are pinching yourself that she is dating you! You are easily blinded by her beauty, though.  She has anger outbursts, unpredictable moods, one minute wants a hug and the next is biting your head off. She may have an actual personality disorder (borderline? narcissistic?) and zero insight about her behavior.  She may even say she has “bad PMS,” but do not buy that excuse! You deserve someone who is stable and in control of her emotions. Relationships hit enough bumps in the road – you don’t need someone who is creating drama daily for no reason.

Dating The Control Freak

She’s domineering and bossy. She makes all the decisions and beats you down when you try to assert yourself. She decides where you go on dates and who you go with. She may be isolating you from your regular friends. You are starting to become her lap dog. You may even begin to wonder if it matters that you exist in the relationship, as you have no voice. Your friends are definitely noticing. They are losing respect for you and see you as spineless.  It is time to take back your self-respect and leave her.

Dating The Co-Dependent One

She is a bottomless well of needs and ultra clingy. You must constantly reassure her of your love, and that everything in the relationship is okay. She wanted to get married from date three and believes you are her “soulmate.”  If you call and don’t answer or respond to texts instantly, she is in a panic. Forget about any “boy’s night out.” Your phone will be blowing up all evening. There is no way for you ever to make this person feel secure and you may die trying to.   

Dating A Liar

This woman just can’t be trusted – she breaks promises, doesn’t follow through, flakes out on important occasions, and has a poor relationship track record. Perhaps even her friends have warned you about getting involved with her (probably passive aggressively by “joking” about it). If these aren’t red flags enough, maybe you need some therapy also.

Midwest Matchmaking Can Help You Find the Right Kansas City Single

If you are dating any of these above personality types, it is crucial that you consider the impact this person is having on your life. These types can be disastrous for your well-being and happiness. Would you want this woman raising your children?  Chances are, your gut is telling you to run, but you are getting something out of the relationship that makes this difficult. You must move on from women like this and find a healthy, balanced partnership for life.

Call Midwest Matchmaking and have one of our Kansas City Matchmakers help you find someone special. 

Midwest Matchmaking has been helping Midwest singles find love for over a decade. Learn more at MidwestMatchmaking.com.

Chances are great that you’ve looked for love in Kansas City up to this point, via online dating app and websites since you’re likely unaware of Midwest Matchmaking. Well, the good news is that Kansas City matchmakers exist and can help you find a local love connection in the area so that you’re not having to rely on platforms that are proven unsuccessful time and time again.

In addition to being unsuccessful in finding you a real relationship, there are also issues such as ghosting, catfishing, breadcrumbing, and now, orbiting. The definition: If you’ve dated in the age of social media, chances are you’ve been watched, liked and followed by a crush, a lover or an ex.

Prying eyes on dating apps can be exciting when they come from a prospective romantic partner; not so much when the looker is an ex. In the last case, it’s as though the specter of a Relationship That Could Have Been is peeping over your shoulder, keeping tabs without having to commit to any real-world interactions.

Unlike ghosting, which is a fancy word for disappearing from a lover’s life without notice, orbiting could not have existed before dating apps. Distant methods of digital observation are what binds the orbiter and the orbited. 

Finding love in Kansas City has never been more challenging through online dating alone.

The way it feels to be orbited depends on your relationship to the orbiter. When you’re interested in the satellite entity watching your social media activity, orbiting brings an endorphin rush, the feeling of being circled by someone you want to get closer to.

But when it’s bad, it’s bad. There’s the frustration of wondering why an ex would rather watch your life than be part of it. There’s the disappointment when someone who has been orbiting for some time never does get any closer. And there’s acceptance of the hard truth of all digital romance: Eventually the relationship must be taken offline, or brought to an end.

Now, orbiting isn’t always intentional. Instagram Stories stream seamlessly into one another (and ads), so it’s possible to view someone’s day-to-day updates unintentionally without ever digging deeper into their posting history. On Facebook, you have to regularly and carefully check your settings, and re-check them, to ensure their Privacy Policies haven’t changed since the last time you thought your photos and/or profile were private. 

How hiring Kansas City matchmakers can defeat the orbiting phenomenon:

By working with Midwest Matchmaking, finding a local love connection can become a private, discrete process where your photos and information are not out there in the digital world for all of your former flames to see. Instead, you are only visible to the other members in our database, and only if you approve them first. 

Additionally, finding love in Kansas City through the help of a Midwest matchmaker, guarantee that the other clients in the service are taking the search for love equally as seriously. There will be no ghosting, catfishing or bread crumbing through Midwest Matchmaking – only matches who want to meet you, and vice versa. Also, the matchmakers arrange your dates for you so you don’t need to worry about the initial contact and an awkward drawn-out text exchange prior. 

It is a fact that dating is confusing, and orbiting can make things that much worse. Small online behaviors are infinitely interpretable, making it impossible to understand where you and another person stand. The lurking of a potential connection makes you wonder whether they’ll ever materialize in person. And the orbiting ex only serves to keep you mired in a shadow version of the relationship, wondering, each time he or she views one of your Stories, what happened or what could have been.

If you’re tired of being ghosted, orbited or catfished, call Midwest Matchmaking!

Let our Kansas City Matchmakers get you off dating apps, and introduce you to a more exclusive, reputable and serious approach. Visit us at www.midwestmatchmaking.com  

Not too long ago, singles began to consider marriage in their early 20s, but now the average age for Midwest singles to settle down is 29 for males and 27 for females, according to Midwest Matchmaking’s stats. Why are people waiting so long to marry? And is it helping or hurting their chances of marital success?

Matchmakers in Kansas City are seeing a trend that although young singles want to have a great marriage, they keep putting it off. This is occurring across almost all countries, races and backgrounds. 

Researcher Katherine Edin found that marriage was a dream for most people living in poverty, a luxury they hoped to indulge in someday when the time was right, but generally not something they saw happening in the near or even the foreseeable future.

What Kansas City matchmakers noticed based on our own research, is that there seem to be three prevalent myths that Midwest singles buy into when it comes to waiting for marriage:

Myth #1: Waiting for marriage leads to greater success. 

In some ways, it is true that marrying later leads to better marriages. Studies have shown that marrying after 30 significantly improves your chances of making it. On the other hand, premarital sex, premarital cohabitation and unwed childbearing contributed to marital instability.

Myth #2: “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas”.

This cliche phrase is used to compartmentalize risky activities apart from their effects on a future marriage. Many singles operate under the premise that sowing their wild oats before they get married will not impact their marriage relationship, but this is not the case. In a puritan twist on this research, studies also have shown that the number of sexual partners singles had before they married were directly related to their chances of divorce. A 2003 study found that involvement with just one partner outside of marriage raised the risk of divorce three times higher than those who had only had sex with their spouse.

Myth #3: Marriage takes more than it gives. 

Society sends this message to singles often: our kids need to slow down, delay settling down, experience and enjoy life, and not to marry until they have to.   

The implication for the emerging adult is that when you finally get married it’s as if you stepped into a life sentence of limited options. Kansas City matchmakers believe the truth is just the opposite: marriage creates a framework that gives you something more than what you can gain and be by yourself.

Midwest Matchmaking’s advice for not falling prey to marriage myths:

First, educate yourself on any big decision you are considering. It’s helpful to know that what you do now programs your future behavior and attitude toward commitment. Keep marriage close on the horizon versus a distant goal, if this is something you do eventually want in your life.

Many parents are cultivating a narcissistic and compartmentalized view of dating and the 20s in their children. I would encourage any single to move commitment closer on the horizon, to consciously work at a better attitude toward marriage and to live in a way that would not jeopardize marriage in the future.

Are you a Kansas City single looking for marriage? 

Contact Midwest Matchmaking, and our team of Kansas City Matchmakers will help introduce you to the love of your life! Learn more at MidwestMatchmaking.com.