3 Successful Tips for Dating a Busy Person

If you have been dating in the Midwest for a while and have encountered those Iowa singles who are always on the go, focused on their careers or traveled often for work, you know that making the time to meet them for a drink was nearly impossible. This, of course, is something we see often with Midwest Matchmaking clients: they seek a local matchmaking service, go through the arduous process of hiring us, and they have limited availability for us to arrange their dates. And, a lot of times, this frustrates their dates, who are eagerly waiting to meet them – either for a first date, or anxiously awaiting that 2nd or 3rd.

Before you discount meeting these busybodies, take these aspects into consideration: When the economy tanked, the job market became unbelievably competitive. It caused a lot of people to shift their priorities and the mindset became to find a job, keep a job or become an entrepreneur. Though love has taken a backseat to employment and financial security, the need to find love is still there and there millions of professional singles in the Midwest who are looking for their perfect match. Which is why they hired Midwest Matchmaking in the first place

Timing is everything, especially dating in the Midwest, where traditionally, the work ethic is strong; and it takes a lot of patience and understanding to date a career-minded single. It’s definitely not for the needy or insecure and it takes a lot of work for both parties to build and nurture a romantic relationship. Although it’s a lot of work, it can be well worth your time if you see something special within that person. And, look at the bright side, you’re dating someone who is local, successful and ambitious! It’s certainly better than the alternative, for some. As matchmakers in the Midwest, we actually hear all the time that our clients want someone driven, not lazy, a go-getter, and who has the means to enjoy life with them. You sure wouldn’t get that level of a drive from someone who is stationary in life. You take the good with the bad, in this case.

If you are a busy professional, dating another busy professional or at least considering it, here are Midwest Matchmaking’s top tips on how to make the most of your time together and make it work for you. This article on using the Law of Attraction in dating is another good resource, written by one of our own! 

1. Use Technology

Dating singles in the Midwest who are constantly on the go can be hard. Thanks to cell phones and video chats though, now you have almost every tool in your tech arsenal to bridge the gap and spend more time with your date, even if it’s over a screen. Text messages, pictures, video chat, instant message are all viable means of staying bridging connected and building on that chemistry. Chances are, they are already using these tools for work, so getting them to engage shouldn’t be that difficult if they are considering making it work with you.

Don’t underestimate the power of a phone call. Even if they can only chat for a short while, or if you have to leave a voicemail, hearing your voice can still put a smile on their face. At least you are making an effort and if the action is returned, you know that they making an effort with you.

2. Make The Most of Your Time Together and Start-Off Casual

For the early stages of dating through Midwest Matchmaking, scheduling will be key, and we will do that part for you anyway (the first and second dates, that is). Sometimes, you will have work to find ways to be more efficient with the time you do have available. The busy person has a clear understanding of the value of time so when you do have time together, focus on having fun and enjoying each other’s company.

Also make it a point to create exciting and memorable moments The more intimate, the better because this is the time you can use to nurture the relationship that is forming. Not every date has to be extravagant and over the top. Simplicity can be bliss for someone who deals with high-pressure work environments. By now you should have an idea of some things that make him or her tick. Use it to your advantage and they will appreciate it. And, you can always ask your Midwest matchmaker for advice. We’re here to help!

Take your time to feel the person out. Go on a number of coffee or lunch dates in your area and get to know the person. Focus on the conversation and see if you can understand their lifestyle of a busy single. Find ways in which you can relate to each other and make a connection. This will also give you an idea as to how busy your date really is and how open he or she really is to a relationship should the feelings develop.

Sometimes people will say they are busy, but as matchmakers in the Midwest, we sometimes hear that really, they are using it as an excuse to cover the fact that they are either afraid of commitment, looking for booty calls rather than a relationship or simply not that into you.

Measure the level of exchange. Just because your local dates are more casual in nature doesn’t mean that there shouldn’t be a healthy level of give and take. After a few dates and conversations, you should have a better understanding as to if there is a genuine interest to connect on a romantic level versus a busy schedule being a symptom of reluctance. At that point, make a decision and see if this is something you want to explore.

3. Be Realistic

Should you decide to explore the relationship you want, make sure you have a realistic expectation when you get started. Matchmakers in your area are pros at being honest to our clients about what their expectations should be. If both parties are on the same page about moving forward, you need to make sure all expectations are laid out on the table and discussed. Make sure you communicate your needs and you listen to theirs.

Also, make sure you honest about your comfort level. If your date is only available to see you on the weekends or is out of town on business for two weeks out of the month, are you going to be OK with that? Certain aspects of his or her career are not going to change anytime soon and you have to make sure you are prepared. If not, you may have to accept that this just isn’t the right time to try to start a relationship with this person, and move on. There are plenty of singles in the Midwest – go fishing for some, or let Midwest Matchmaking help with that.

All in all, if there is a genuine connection with someone, don’t let their busy lifestyles intimidate you. Be confident! Show them you can handle it (or are willing to try). At least give it a shot. Busy people need love, too.

Dating a busy single in the Midwest have you frustrated? Let our local matchmakers at Midwest Matchmaking help! Give us a call at (833) 4MW-LOVE today, or visit us at www.midwestmatchmaking.com!

How The Law Of Attraction Will Get You Better Dates

Here at Midwest Matchmaking, our local matchmakers are drawn to the concept of the Law of Attraction because of its potential for results, not only in your life, but in your dating life as well. Here, our dating experts have many tricks up their sleeves when considering who to match our clients with, and this method is one of them!

Below, taken from the website (www.thelawofattraction.com), here are 10 ways in which you can use this powerful spiritual tool to aid in your search for Mr. or Mrs. Right.

1. Midwest Matchmakers Recommend Developing A Positive Attitude To Love

It’s so easy to be held back by negative, limiting beliefs about manifesting love. While you might think you’re sufficiently positive if you’re aware that you yearn for romance and daydream about being with that special someone, it pays to take a critical look at your underlying assumptions.

Perhaps painful Midwest dating experiences have left you worrying that love can’t last, or you have niggling doubts about actively pursuing a partner because “finding your soul mate should happen naturally.” In either case, you’re holding limiting beliefs that stop you from using your full power to attract a mate.

To develop a positive attitude about dating in the Midwest, try spending at least half an hour writing out a list of negative assumptions you might be making about love. For each belief, write down a challenge, and focus on that challenge.

For example “Relationships are always painful in the end” becomes “When I meet the right person, my relationship will be satisfying and joyful.”

2. Learn To Love Yourself

While it might sound like a cliché, our team of local matchmakers in the Midwest believe it is crucial to have a positive attitude towards yourself if you’re going to use the Law of Attraction as an effective tool in your love life to create a Midwest love connection. Basically, being down on yourself prevents you from sending out the right signals about what you want from other people, and it also encourages others to view you in a negative light.

As with negative beliefs about love, the key to correcting the harmful beliefs you have about yourself is to really dig deep into your memories and your past, identifying exactly what these beliefs are and working out where they came from. As you make a list of these assumptions, write down their origins and a replacement belief that is more positive and productive.

For example “I’m not attractive enough to deserve a great lover” could be marked as something you believe because of someone who bullied you at school, and a challenge could be “Many friends and acquaintances make positive comments about my appearance” (or even “Everyone is attractive enough to deserve a great lover.”)

3. Take Something Good From Every Date

Of course, not every date is going to leave you feeling elated and fantasizing about spending the rest of your life with the other person. However, if you ensure that you take something good from every date, you maintain a positive attitude towards dating more broadly—and you learn useful things that bring you another step closer to the right relationship.

When you’re on a date, try to exist purely in the present moment—this “mindful dating” approach helps you be more open to possibilities, and boosts your chances of enjoying yourself. Meanwhile, once the date is over, figure out at least one productive lesson that you’ve learned.

4. Let Relationships Evolve Naturally

As noted above, there’s nothing wrong with seeing romance as something that requires effort and energy (rather than sitting back and waiting for someone great to arrive on your doorstep).

However, you’re shooting yourself in the foot if you let your mind leap ahead, creating a negative narrative that may never come to pass. If you think about it, such dread is actually a form of creative visualization—according to our local matchmakers, you’re reducing your chances of finding love if you spend all your time imagining your date won’t text back or didn’t find your company enjoyable. Stay focused on your other pursuits and on any positive feelings you have about the developing relationship, and just let it all unfold.

5. Visualize Every Day

Speaking of creative visualization, make sure you spend at least 10-15 minutes a day imagining the relationship context that you want to be in. Using the full force of your imagination, build up every detail of how it feels to be loved and cherished, and try to take this feeling wherever you go—this is part of “living in the knowing” (a  technique involving acting as though you already have what you need).

Further, remember that visualizations are more powerful when they involve all senses—imagine the touch, taste, smell and sounds of your ideal partner.

6. Break Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Thinking outside the box is a fantastic way to increase your chances of success in the Midwest dating world. While this is a common piece of advice, it is especially likely to be successful when combined with the positive attitude and eagerness to learn discussed above.

Know that you can and will find the right person for you, and be playful and curious when it comes to new approaches (e.g. online dating, local matchmaking services speed dating, or being set up with a friend-of-a-friend).

7. Make A Dream, or Vision Board

This is one of the 6 Physical Steps to attracting love, things you can do right NOW.

If you’re a single in the Midwest, and have been learning about the Law of Attraction for a while, you’re probably already familiar with dream boards—and you should definitely make one about your dating life!

Fill it with images that represent what you want in dating (whether they’re your photographs or clippings from magazines), and put it in a prominent location. Feel free to include words that resonate with you as well.

8. Let Your True Self Shine

Professional matchmaking experts tend stress the importance of authenticity—if you’re not living life as the person you really are, you’re inhibiting your ability to attract what you really want. When it comes to dating local singles, the message here is that you should be honest and forthright about your personality, passions and interests.

9. Design Dating Affirmations

Another staple Law of Attraction technique our Midwest matchmakers use are affirmations. These can work wonders for your confidence and help you tune into your belief that you can achieve your goals. For example, try saying “Whatever the outcome, I’m going to have a great time” into the mirror before meeting your date, or saying “I’m excited, happy and ready to meet my match” every morning—you never know who you might meet!

10. Be Open To Surprise

Finally, try not to make snap judgments about dating singles. They might look the part yet be boring underneath, or they may appear a bit scruffy and yet conceal the wicked sense of humor you’ve been waiting for.

While it’s great to have a clear idea of your wants and needs in a relationship, it’s equally important not to rule people out without giving them a chance. Trust that the universe is sending the right people your way, whether for learning or for lifelong love!

Dating in the Midwest have you down? Let Midwest Matchmaking help prepare you for first date success. Call us today at (833) 4MW-LOVE.

Six Tips for Dating Success

Our Midwest Matchmakers worked together to contribute a few ideas each to compile for our clients to aid in their success on dates.

Below are six tips to help anyone who is single and looking for straight-forward, cut-to-the-chase ways to help find the love of their life:

Figure out what you want

So many people don’t realize that this most crucial step starts with them. Do not get so wrapped up in “finding love” or “pleasing others” that you forget what you want out of the deal. You don’t need to pick whoever will have you. However, you also don’t need to obsess about every little detail, especially things that haven’t happened yet (the “What Ifs”). A general idea of what you would like from a partner is best. How would you like them to act? What would you like them to do? How should they treat you? What type of relationship are you looking for? Take a moment (or longer) and figure it out.

Decide what you will give in return

There is no such thing as getting something for nothing. Dating and relationships are no exception. So, what are you planning to bring to the exchange? Be honest – don’t undersell or oversell yourself. Think about all of the strengths, benefits, and positive qualities you have to share with a partner. Have a clear idea about what you are going to give back to them.

Check your expectations

Take a good look at what you want versus what you’re willing to give. Does it match up? Is it a realistic trade? Make sure the exchange you’re planning is equitable and fair, for both you and for your prospective partners. Make it a good deal on both ends.

Know your dating market

(what “they” want) – Here is where you take into consideration what your potential partners might want. But, you don’t have to be so vague and guess about all men, women, etc. You know what you want. So, search for the people who match that and find out what they want.

For example, if you want a healthy, active woman… talk to a few in your area and find out what they like. If you’re looking for creative men, then check out what they are into.

Shop around. Get to know the dating market you’re interested in – and what they are looking for in return.

Assess your options

Once you know your dating market, you can see who might be interested in an exchange. Find the partners who fit with what you want. Qualify and assess them. Then see whether what you’re willing to give matches up with their wants too. Negotiate a little and see what works. Is it a good fit? Can you strike a deal? Is it a win-win? See what your options for “trading partners” look like.

Pick an option or reassess your plan

If you find a good deal, go with it. Especially when the relationship is fair, satisfying, and the best alternative for both you and them. However, if you don’t like your options, then it is time to rethink the steps above. Go through them again. Is what you want a little unrealistic? Do you need to give a little more to get who you really want? Are your expectations unrealistic? Do you need to try a different dating group, time, location to find someone to connect with?

Let our Exclusive Midwest Matchmakers help you repeat, refine, and rework the process. Eventually, you will find a connection (or several) that works. Happy love-hunting!